Surviving Was Just the Beginning

From Beyond the Arc: Reflections on Resilience, Identity, & Life Podcast · 7:40

Show by Amy Gamble

Have you ever noticed when you physically create space that it often carries over to your mental capacity too?Stuff takes up energy. Kind of like emotional baggage as well.I’ve noticed that sometimes my greatest reflection moments come when I least expect it. I was sitting in the living room watching a YouTube video on the seven elements that make a good memoir.I only made it through the first three before I began typing away on the keyboard. The third element was emotional honesty. Before that, it was personal transformation and universal truths.That was enough to spark me into analyzing what the actual subject of Unsilenced, my memoir published in 2023, was really about. The subject is not really about healing from trauma or bipolar disorder; the subject is reclaiming personal power—finding your voice, reclaiming your identity, and discovering what becomes possible after surviving experiences that threatened to define or silence you.I hadn’t really written much about the election or politics, but in a discussion with my sister today, I reminded her that many people felt disenfranchised, not heard, overlooked, not having a voice, and left behind. This is what seemingly led to many people lining up behind one party or another.She said, “I felt that way. I felt as if people tried to put me down because I didn’t go to college. They treated me as if they were better than me.”And there it was…an aha moment waiting to be realized. I answered, “I understand what it’s like to be discounted, overlooked, written off, and left out. When people treat you differently because of your diagnosis, when they think they’re better than you because they never had to deal with what you did, when they’re judging you and discounting all of who you are, well, it’s similar to being thought you’re less than because you don’t have a college degree.”Thanks for reading Beyond the Arc: Reflections on Resilience, Identity, & Life! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.I then went on a tangent, which I’ll spare you the details of. The gist is I said how important it is to me to have a voice. To stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves. To encourage others to use their voice.Essentially, to encourage people, everyone, to become Unsilenced.There are people I know who have so much to offer. But because they’ve been beaten down one too many times, they question whether it’s worth it to be seen, heard, acknowledged. Some give up their dreams before they’re realized because they can’t find the courage to be vulnerable.What I’ve learned through writing and sharing what I write, from speaking to thousands of people over the years, is that the courage to be vulnerable will return to you a million times over a healthy dosage of internal strength.When we speak up, we are heard. You know the saying, the squeaky wheel gets the grease? It’s true for humans too.When we own our histories, oftentimes painful parts of our past, and when we acknowledge, of course, there are things that we could have done better or differently. However, we give ourselves the gift of forgiveness.And as Maya Angelou once said, “When you know better, you do better!”At the same time, I’ve come to realize since writing Unsilenced that forgiveness of self and others is a necessary step in our healing. There will be things in life that are quite honestly just flat-out unfair, wrong, and a terrible injustice done to each and every one of us.I don’t know anyone who hasn’t been in a position where they might say, “Life just isn’t fair.”Sometimes it’s not fair. Sometimes people do and say some terrible things.Sometimes we do some crappy things too. I’m not immune from intentionally or unintentionally hurting other people. I’m human.I used to beat myself up terribly when I thought I’d made a mistake and hurt someone’s feelings. Said the wrong thing. I’d ruminate over it.There was a moment not too long ago when I said to myself, “Wow, Amy, you’re kind of being tone-deaf in that situation.” But there was nothing I could do to change what I’d said. All I could do was learn from my mistake.When I think about the universal message of Unsilenced, I believe it is the past doesn’t have to determine your future. The ghosts and goblins hiding under all of our beds can be haunting. And this is when seeing them, acknowledging them, and doing some good old-fashioned cleaning can clear out that kind of energy.My mother once said to me, “When you’re finished writing Unsilenced, do you think you can throw it over your shoulder?” Her way of saying, let it go.At the time she said that, which was nearly four years ago, my answer was I wasn’t sure. But if she were here today, I’d tell her, “Yes. I can throw it over my shoulder and move forward with my life.”I’ve learned that the theme that resonates predominantly through most of my writing is the promise that never giving up can almost always yield a positive outcome. It might not be the outcome we had our heart set on…

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